I took my old web diary and converted it into blog posts today, so this blog now has posts dating back to 1998. Does that make this blog the oldest in Montreal??
It was strange reading that old stuff, my blogging style has obviously changed and evolved over the years but I should try to get back into the habit of actually writing about my life instead of essays on blogging and religion.
For the moving sale we had recently, Jen carefully prepared a whole bunch of “surprise” gift bags containing various useless paper products and other goodies. We were selling them for $1 each.
They did not sell well.
We needed to get rid of them, so I decided to take them to work and hand them out to my colleagues. I got as far as the train and decided the bag was too heavy to carry all the way to work. My solution was to hand the gift bags out to all the people sitting in my chosen train car.
I guess in this cynical world we live in people don’t expect to get something for nothing, so I received many bemused looks. It seemed as though most people thought I was a complete weirdo or I was selling something. Some people even refused my offer.
Out of about 40 people I gave bags to I got about 5 thank yous. The people who said thank you were invariably under 16. Do we get less polite as we get older?
Last night was Guy Fawke’s Night, at least in the UK.
I miss panhandling with a thing made of old clothes stuffed with straw sitting in a shopping trolley.
I miss burning effigies on a bonfire of household junk.
I miss pooling our money so we can buy a big catherine wheel to set off in the bus stop.
I miss waving sparklers around like it’s fun.
I miss risking life and limb by approaching a rocket that didn’t go off.
I miss the sound of ambulance sirens rushing to third degree burns.
It’s time to bring Guy Fawke’s Night to Canada so my son doesn’t miss out on all that fun.
Two girls sitting next to me on the train today were busy cramming for a math test. Listening to them made me realise how much I’ve forgotten. Apparently I can’t do trigonometry any more, and my algebra skills are seriously rusty.
I was a good little student at school and my brain was like a sponge, soaking up knowledge. That knowledge has been slowly dripping out over the years; I’m sure I’ve forgotten half the stuff I learned at school. Of course the forgotten knowledge has been replaced by new and different knowledge, but still it’s sad to think of all that lost information.
I just hope I retain enough to be able to help Aidan with his homework.
Most weekday afternoons, free copies of the Montreal Gazette are given away on street corners around the city. The nice men who give me free papers are not always at the same intersections though, so I have to plan my route to the train station very carefully.
I walk down McGill College to St Catherine Street, where there is sometimes a free paper man. If he’s not there I walk along St Catherine Street to Peel, where there is sometimes a free paper man. If he’s not there I walk down Peel to Rene Levesque, where there is sometimes a free paper man. If he’s not there I walk down to the Bell centre where my last chance free paper man sometimes is. It’s a sad day when I reach the station without a paper.
Thank you to Empire Auctions for supplying me with comics, two crosswords and a sudoku for my journey home. Most days.
Seen on McGill classified ads:
I need a safty google for chemistry lab so badly.
Took me a second to work out what a safty google is.
Overheard on the train this morning:
“Can you imagine if there was no Myspace? I’d be so bored, there’d be, like, nothing to do.”
I did this before, but I feel like doing it again. Besides, I have nothing else to blog about today.
On my desk is:
So what’s on your desk?
As I mentioned recently, this week is back to school week. I’ve been seeing lots of greetings between old friends on the train as kids get together after a summer apart. This has highlighted a significant difference between the sexes.
The girls employ the “squeal-hug” technique: they see each other, they squeal at each other, and they run into a warm embrace which lasts several seconds. They then talk at high speed about everything that happened to them over the summer.
The boys on the other hand use the “grunt-slap-bump” technique: they grunt at each other in a manly way, they perform some variety of hand slap, optionally involving extra twiddly bits if they’re trying to look really cool, then they bump opposing shoulders, as if they are trying to hug but miss.
These are the things I notice while travelling to work.
Stolen from Blork…
Have you ever . . . (bold means Yes I Have)
01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink (ok so there were only 5 people in the bar)
02. Swam with wild dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said ‘I love you’ and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Bungee jumped (chickened out in NZ)
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights (still trying)
15. Gone to a huge sports game
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby’s diaper(!)
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer (only two?)
40. Visited all 50 states
41. Taken care of someone who was shit faced
42. Had amazing friends (All friends are amazing, aren’t they?)
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched wild whales
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe (in but not across)
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer then you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your cds (my wife has)
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Posed nude in front of strangers
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River
82. Been on television news programs as an “expert”
83. Got flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Had a one-night stand
89. Gone to Thailand
90. Bought a house
91. Been in a combat zone
92. Buried one/both of your parents
93. Been on a cruise ship
94. Spoken more than one language fluently
95. Performed in Rocky Horror.
96. Raised children. (well up to 8 months old anyway)
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
98. Created and named your own constellation of stars
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over (ok, not just to start over)
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived.
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Petted a stingray
110. Broken someone’s heart
111. Helped an animal give birth
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse
119. Had major surgery
120. Had a snake as a pet
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat
127. Eaten sushi
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Petted a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad - and the Odyssey
135. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions (assuming there were any)
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language (kinda sorta)
141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146: Dyed your hair
147: Been a DJ
148: Shaved your head
149: Caused a car accident
150: Saved someone’s life
Happy new year everyone, time to take a look back at 2005.
Happy [insert winter solstice festival of choice] to you all, I hope it is filled with joy, good food, good drink and much festiveness. May [insert gift bringer of choice] bring everything you wanted and a few surprises too.
Happy Thanksgiving all you American folk. It’s too close to Xmas for us, we had our thanksgiving last month.
On this day of giving thanks, Americans should be most thankful for one thing:
The 22nd Amendment to the American Constitution.