Occasionally I accidentally read Anne Landers, or more correctly, Annie’s Mailbox as it is now called.
The terrible crisis in my most recent accidental reading was the following:
A woman bought an expensive perfume for her sister. There was a “gift with purchase” thing going on and the woman wanted to know if it was ok if she kept the bonus gift.
Holy fucking crap. Someone actually took the time to write a letter to ask if it was ok to keep something that she paid for.
Perhaps I will start a column. It might look something like this:
I would like to stick forks in my eyes, is this a good idea?
Who Gives a Fork
Dear Who Gives a Fork,
I love the internet! I love signing up for things and I love getting email, especially from foreigners in places like Nigeria. My friends say I shouldn’t be so quick to divulge personal and financial information, I see no harm in it. Who is right?
I Heart AOL
Dear I Heart AOL,
Your friends are.
If you have a problem that is tearing you apart, please feel free to write to me.